no guiding life left inside
by hieress
Summary: "But you're my sister. I'm supposed to be there for you, no matter what." - Because we all need some italian demigod sibling fics


Bathing. In a river, no less. The river is black and really fast. The boy is scared that the river's flow will take him away, away, away, to the castle looming in the distance, maybe. It scares him because it is also black and really big and weird decorations.

He's underwater now and blackness fills him.

Silence.

When finally he could feel earth under his bum, a voice says, "Nico."

Was that his name?

* * *

"Can you _please, _shut _up_?" She turned to the lawyer. "Who _are _you?" It really annoys Nico how she always emphasize her words, especially when she's annoyed and angry.

"Call me Mr. Smith, please." The lawyer said. Nico was scared of the guy. Mr. Smith has this really broad shoulders and is really tall, so Nico instantly disliked him. He doesn't like it when people are a whole lot taller than him because it makes him feel small, and useless, unimportant, _unwanted._ "I've a message from your dad."

"Our _dad?_ He's alive?"

"No, no." Mr. Smith chuckled. "He left you a trust fund, you see. He wants you to go to school, go to camp, live a happy life - if possible, marry, have kids, etc., etc." He actually said "e-t-c," which was bizarre, because he said it two times, so it almost sounded like a word he just made up.

Nico tried to say it in his mind.

_E-t-c e-t-c. _Weird.

_E-t-c._

Despite his chanting, he processed a few informations. Their father. Dead. School. Happy Lives. Marry, Have kids. Bleaugh.

He's not sure what to feel about his father's death.

Should he feel sad? Maybe he should, it's his father, after all.

Wait. _Who_ is his father?

No face comes up in his mind, where there should be, with flashing multicolored fireworks. At least, that's what he saw in the movies.

Why has he forgotten his own father's face?

When was the last time they'd met?

Maybe it was before they came into the hotel?

If so, then the last time they met was three weeks ago. Or maybe a month. Still, he doesn't think he's old enough to forget someone for only a month. Especially his father. He's only ten after all. Something's wrong.

He looks at Bianca.

She doesn't remember either.

* * *

The lawyer gave them lots of money. He says Father left it for them. They ask the lawyer who Father was but he ignores them. They both have money, though, so it's okay. Except that Bianca had them all. Nico'd really wanted to buy a set of Mythomagic cards as he saw in an advertisement.

He wants to ask her to buy a set for him but he doesn't because Bianca is still really annoyed. They can't remember their father, or their mother, or where they used to live. She's also annoyed that Nico doesn't feel bothered with this. He should be, she says. But he can't. He's too scared and amazed. The buildings are huge and the night is bright with colors and there are lots of people and it makes him feel so, so small. Much small than Mr. Smith did. Much small than he ever was.

* * *

"Why _here_?"

"Here" is a castle, that's supposed to be a school. At least, Mr. Smith tells them, anyway. Nico doesn't like it, like most of the things he saw since he was checked out of the hotel. It gives him the creeps. He thinks it's familiar, like he saw it already. He tries to grasp the memory but it flies away from his focus.

"Don't know." Bianca sighs. "Smith says dad wants us here. Hopefully he doesn't mean forever or we'd be meeting dad sooner."

* * *

Nico doesn't like school. It was too dark and full of weapons. He doesn't know why the teachers would put it there, there are lots of stupid kids in here and they might start killing off each other.

Some kids are really mean. Mostly they ignore them but some get bored and make fun of them. Especially the girls on Bianca. Nico especially hated these girls.

Most of the insults seem harmless, Bianca doesn't mind those. She just turns her head and mutters something under her breath. Nico usually get teased because of his obsession on Mythomagic, and he wants to tell the others off, but Bianca says it's nothing, just stupid words that mean _nothing_, because, who are they to speak, anyway?

But there are also very rude and offending ones, like about their parents being gone. Bianca _almost_ punched a boy named David during Math class._  
_

They don't have much friends, so they eat and talk with each other, except for the weird kid, Grover. He laughs weirdly and eats too much. He's fun to be around with sometimes, though.

The teachers like Bianca, but Nico can tell they don't favor him much. They don't say it directly but the way they say it, "_Nico,_ what _now?_" in a very exasperated tone with an exasperated sigh, and the way they turn up their nose at him sometimes, he knows. Dr. Thorn, especially.

Nico doesn't mind it, though. He's got Bianca.

* * *

Winter was barely in sight when Nico caught the flu.

In all the things he'd disliked since he came out of the hotel, _this _was definitely what he disliked the most. He can't breathe properly, he had to sneeze and sniff and cough every few seconds, his throat burns, and his head hurts so he can't get up. He can't even play with his Mythomagic cards.

He was excused from classes, which was fine with him, but Nico realized that Bianca would be eating alone in their table in the back. Maybe Grover would join her, maybe not. Nico couldn't let that happen.

Monday morning, Nico was up. Five seconds later, a sneeze was heard.

He didn't even try to take a bath, he's as cold as he can be. His head was still pounding and he was still sniffing and sneezing and coughing and making annoying sounds and he feels weak, but Bianca needs him and he has to be there.

She was always there for him, after all, and nothing, not even the worst case of illness stopped it.

* * *

When he arrives to the cafeteria for breakfast (which he wasn't supposed to do, Bianca says so, that he should wait for her to bring him food) he sees the boy, David, the one he wanted to punch and also the one who Bianca almost punched.

Yes, the very same boy, sitting on his chair.

Beside Bianca.

Nico knows immediately what this means. He'd watched enough movies in Lotus Hotel. Bianca wouldn't approve of this, of course, but he really likes those in the "chick flicks" category. Nico doesn't understand most of it, and the kissy kissy parts were gross but some were really funny and some were really sad. (He knows it isn't manly but he cries at those. He thinks it's okay. Really, though, you have to be Voldemort not to cry at these stuff.)

He knows how this works, at least, he thinks so. Bianca is this sweet girl (_not,_ thinks Nico) and David is this bad boy. A funny, cool, good looking, bad boy. Bianca will start to think that David is actually a funny, cool, good looking, _good _boy who cries because he has emotions and will start to like him and start calling him "Dave" or "Davie" or "Dave-y poo." Bianca isn't like that, of course, but it's what Nico sees in the movies. And David will start calling Bianca "Baby" or "Honeycakes" or "Sweetie pie." And then, when they get to the kissy kissy part, David will see another girl wearing skirt and leave Bianca and start the process with the girl wearing skirt. Really, these sort of stuff are simple.

And where does Nico come to this? Nico will play the protective brother. He will beat up David and yell at him and threaten him and ask him embarrassing questions like, "What did you think of Titanic? Did you cry at the end?" and David will say no and Nico would tell him that he is heartless and mean and Voldemort in disguise and will not allow him to date Bianca. They might still date in private but Nico will know - he'd watched enough movies.

But what doesn't fit is Bianca. Bianca is strong and yells at him and burns _noodles _and laughs at Titanic and thought of joining the Death Eaters. She isn't those girls in the movies.

So why is David there? Why is Bianca laughing? Nico scrunched his face.

Does she think David is a better company? She keeps laughing. Whenever they eat together, they joke around, but mostly, lately, she's been scolding Nico for bringing his Mythomagic stuff to meals.

With a sniff and a sneeze and a cough, the lone boy turned on his back and left.

* * *

He must have fallen asleep, because when he woke up, there was a tray of porridge on his bedside, where cockroaches were feasting. He wrinkled his nose in disgust. When he gets to rule the world, he will eliminate 1.) World Hunger 2.) Wars 3.) Cockroaches 4.) High Prices in Taco Bell and KFC (Nico thought both were the best things invented ever since everything in Lotus Hotel, but he was a poor boy and.. _well._)

He looked at the clock._ 12:30_. Lunch Time. His new food should be here anytime soon. Hopefully it's something as greasy as everything in KFC.

Just as he felt a sneeze coming, the door opened and the sneeze receded, giving him a very odd feeling. He hated it when this happen. He tries to sneeze. Nope. It's gone.

"Nico?" It was Bianca. "Why didn't you finish your breakfast?" She frowned to the cockroaches.

"I was asleep..."

"Oh. Here." She passed him a tray. Not a greasy food in sight. "Are you feeling better?"

Nico coughed. "No."

She laughed. "You'll live, brother."

"Much more uncomfortable than you are."

She shook her head, amused. "I'll be back. Don't go anywhere."

"Where are you going? To Davey Poo?"

"_What_?"

"David. You ate breakfast with him, you know."

"You went out?"

"No, Apollo - God of Prophesies - told me."

"_Nico!_ Why'd you go out?"

"I was gonna keep you company."

"But you're sick!"

"But you're my sister. I'm supposed to be there for you, no matter what."

* * *

Four days later, Nico was out and about. Bianca, however had caught the flu, thankfully not as worst as Nico's, but Nico really enjoyed playing nurse, though he wouldn't admit it.

David and Bianca were hanging out more, even when Nico joined them.

One time, the first time the three of them ate together, Nico blurted out, "So, are you two doing kissy kissy stuff together?"

To which he was answered by the usual "_Nico!_" from his sister, who spit out the water she was drinking and a "Not yet, no." from Dave, followed by a laugh.

When Bianca left to tissues, Nico looked at David with narrowed eyes. "Sorry, Davey Poo, you can _never_ do kissy stuff with my sister."

"Says who, Nickypants?"

"Well, me, obviously." Nico rolled his eyes.

"Sorry to break your bubble, Nic-Nic, but we _are_ going to do kissy stuff, with or without your permission. B is growing up and she will find you even more annoying than you currently are, and then ultimately, she will leave you."

_She will leave you._Nico refused to believe this. How could Bianca? She may be a meany to him, but she doesn't actually mean it, he knows. He believes it. He has to. She wouldn't leave him. She couldn't. She's the only thing he has, even if she doesn't like him playing Mythomagic or his Mythomagic references.

And besides, he's all he's got, too.

She can't just suddenly find another family, can she?

* * *

Nico tries to be a good brother. He resisted the urge to comment references to Mythomagic, he didn't bring any cards or figurines when eating. But on the day of the Winter Dance, Nico brings some of his cards because he _knows_ it will be boring. Bianca was dancing with David, so he was alone. Until Grover sat on the table beside him.

Nico tried very hard to ignore the fact that Grover had _everything _wrong. He was just explaining to Grover how Dionysus doesn't choke goats with grapevines or turn them to dolphins when Grover stood, made a bleaching sound and sputtered "Need to go, Nico. I'll be back. Just- just stay here."

"Okay," Nico said gloomily. Even Grover doesn't want to be with him anymore.

"Oh- hey, It's not that-" Grover said. "I just have to talk to some friends. I'll be back, real quick. Promise." He smiled nervously and left.

Seconds later, Bianca was occupying Grover's seat.

"Hey," She sounds enthusiastic. Very, very enthusiastic. Much more enthusiastic than he likes.

"Where's your Daveypants?

"What? Come on, don't be rude."

"Sorry. Didn't mean to offend your boyfriend."

"Nico! _Please._ What is _your _problem?" There she goes with the stressing again, very annoying.

"Nothing. I was actually having fun on my own, talking to my cards, the usual."

"_What_ does _that_ even _mean?_"

Nico knows he should stop now. He can't afford to get in a fight with his sister, David's voice keeps reminding him that. _Ultimately, she will leave you._ And he knows she will if this doesn't stop now but he is just _so _angry. She left Nico for that boy, David. Doesn't she _care_ about her brother anymore? Does that mean she loves David more than him? Does that mean David is also her family now? Why doesn't she dance with Nico? Is she embarrassed to be seen dancing with her younger brother? Is that it? "I don't know, _you _tell me."

"Ex-" There was a swipe of blackness and next thing he hears is not what Bianca's reply might be, but the sound of their feet being dragged on the floor and the muffled protests.

* * *

"Stay here." Dr. Thorn growled and retreated to the shadows.

Nico was scared. Very, very, _very_ scared. He doesn't know what was going on but he was sure he was going to end up like Dionysus if he fought with Zeus. If only Dionysus could turn not only goats, but also very angry gods to dolphins, he might win. _Or_ he could have Zeus inebriated and Zeus would be too dizzy to attack. You can't actually do this on the game, of course, but Nico has been making his own ideas for if he remake Mythomagic when he grows up. He's going to make each character equal. It just seems unfair, just because all Dionysus makes is wine and whine -

Suddenly David appears. Wait. No. It wasn't David. This guy was taller and his eyes were green, except with the same hair. He was holding a very long glow-in-the-dark stick in a position like he was going to slice them in two with it.

Then, out of the shadows, Dr. Thorn appeared. Nico wanted to shout to the guy, but he was terrified, petrified and everything that rhymes and has the same meaning with it.

"My name's Percy," The boy said, oblivious, "I'm going to take you out of here, get you somewhere safe." _Thank Dionysus,_ Nico thought. But there was Dr. Thorn to worry about.

Percy's eyes widened like he realized something. As soon as his body turned a muscle, a sound, like _WHIIISH! _was heard and Percy was on the wall.

Now, Nico was past terrified and petrified and horrified. Percy could have _died. _Is Nico and Bianca going to have the same fate? Who _really _was Dr. Thorn? Obviously he's some kidnapping, murderous vice principal. Really, he should've known, with the obvious decorations in the school that at least one of the staff want to kill their students._  
_

Then Nico heard the same _WHIISH! _sound again but this time, the knife was almost next to him. Next to _Bianca. _She could have _died._ The boy was panicking now.

Dr. Thorn was speaking, but Nico hears nothing, only the sound of blood rushing through his veins.

* * *

The only thing Nico has for comfort is a figurine of Ares. It doesn't give him much comfort, really, but fiddling with it calms him down a bit. Nico thinks everyone around him was speaking but there was a buzz in his ears and he can't concentrate on anything.

Nico thinks he said a few words, too, about his figurine and the helicopter and something else.

_The General. Half-bloods. Monsters. Great Stirring. _Who hired his crazy man?

And then, he felt a hand by his side. Before he can even scream - because, really, this is the _freakiest _thing - he was push to the ground with Bianca. He hears lots of the _whiish _sound but nothing hits him and Bianca, thankfully. He can't really see anything - his head hurts, but he thinks he can still someone playing a pirate dance song. Someone, a girl, yelled - "A manticore!"

_What?_

Instantly, he shot up and his mouth opened. "A manticore? He's got three thousand attack power and plus five to saving throws!" And then he was rudely pushed to the ground again. What he thought was the invisible arm belonged to and invisible girl who was now visible.

The sound of the helicopter was nearer, as if it was very, very near them now. Then, louder than that, he heard another sound: the call of a hunting horn.

The manticore cried.

"The Hunters!" The blond haired girl - who pushed them, said with delight.

And in that moment, Nico knew, they were alright. Whoever these Hunters are, Nico would be very thankful for them, except maybe for the fact that they were what took Bianca away.

* * *

Nico di Angelo learned a lot of things in the past few minutes and had just witnessed two people falling to their death. Okay, maybe just one. But when the manticore - who was their _vice principal _- leaped down the cliff, the blond girl was still on his back and he knew, she was gone.

"Annabeth!" Percy, who still doesn't believe this (doesn't _want_ to, Nico corrects himself. He knew this,) yelled. "You have to let us save her!"

Annabeth. Must be the one who fell off the cliff. Percy wants to save her. He seems like he cares for Annabeth, but they can't be siblings; they don't look alike. Was he her boyfriend? If he was, then Nico thinks that they are good together. Annabeth jumped on the manticore because it was going to attack Percy. Percy wanted to save her when she fell. Obviously, he's a good guy. The read headed girl doesn't want him to jump off the cliff though. Nico didn't, too, until he knew who Percy was. He could've saved Annabeth. Why couldn't he? He was her boyfriend, after all, wasn't he?

He went on asking this to Percy and a bunch of other question. He can tell Percy was trying to control his anger like grown ups do, and he can tell that Percy didn't want to be disturbed, but Nico was pretty shaken up and the Hunter girls took Bianca away to their tent. Percy was the only person he knew. He might try talking with Grover, but he was busy trying to impress the Huntresses like the boys in the movies. (He'd never succeed, too. Nico observed.) Another reason was that Percy lost Annabeth and he knew how sad it must be for him. But try as he might, he could never say nice words he planned to. Or even sorry. All he could do is blabber and call Annabeth an idiot but he could not stop himself.

Finally, on his hundredth question, Percy was called and Nico could tell he was relieved to be away.

Not that Nico could blame the guy.

* * *

Another thing Nico learned is his father wasn't dead. He was very much alive. Though, who it was, Percy said, they don't know yet.

And - get this - Nico's father was an Olympian. Not the one that plays sports and all that (Bianca asked,) but an _Olympian._ As in the gods who lived in Greece. As in the ones in his Mythomagic cards and figurines.

He hoped it was someone cool. Like Zeus, or even Poseidon(who is Percy's _father!_) or even Apollo. He likes Dionysus, too, of course, but it would suck if the only power he had is making wine.

He hopes it wasn't someone evil, like Hades, for example.

* * *

Bianca joined the Hunters.

She was leaving him.

She keeps talking about why and how and what and stuff but Nico doesn't hear her and instead he hears the same ringing in his ears as earlier with Dr. Thorn.

Suddenly, Bianca wasn't Bianca but Mr. Smith who was tall with broad shoulders, and the next she was Westover School, big and looming and black and making him feel small and unimportant and unwanted and he remembers David's words. _She will leave you. She will leave you._ Nico didn't believe him. Nico even tried to be a good brother, but she was _leaving _him.

He doesn't know what exactly he was feeling but it was kind of a mixture of sadness and rage and uneasiness and hatred (to whom, he didn't know) but there is also a feeling of emptiness that may have been Bianca's spot few minutes ago.

_She will leave you, _David had said.

* * *

They were barely two days in camp when Bianca was going to be taken even farther from him. They were going to a quest, he heard.

They had barely talked since they'd arrived in camp. He was taken to the Hermes cabin, while she was there at the Artemis cabin. He hang out with the Hermes kids and others, who said their parents haven't claimed them yet, so they were staying in the Hermes cabin. They were cool, really, they even thought him how to open a car using your shoelace and how to open door locks using just hair pins and how to distract people (he's sure Bianca wouldn't approve but right now, he is mad at her and will do anything to annoy her and notice him,) but they weren't his real family. Not even on the godly side. Bianca was. She was his real family. Godly and mortal-y and everything-else-y but she left him for a bunch of immortal girl group she only met for an hour, and that's what hurt the most.

Bianca stayed with the Hunters. She talked with them and laughed with them and ate with them and practiced archery with them. He can't go near her because apparently, boys can't come near the Hunters. As if boys were the cause of all the monsters around and world hunger and wars and cockroaches and the prices in KFC and Taco Bell. It was also the girls!

The last time they talked, Bianca was saying that Percy would take care of him and that he can do it on his own- he's a grown up now! and that he doesn't need her, now, anyway, she'd only be an annoying sister later on in life.

But the thing is, he wants _Bianca _to take care of him and that he can't do it on his own - he could barely get his own food and tie his own shoes and that he really, really need her, always, no matter how annoying she will be. They'd always protected each other.

They'd always protected each other. Bianca may have given up on that, but he hasn't, despite his anger at her. That was the reason why he'd made Percy promise to take care of Bianca.

* * *

A few days after Percy and Bianca and the others left for the quest, Nico felt weird.

He was out of camp, in the nearest(which wasn't so near) convenience store, with Travis and Connor. He was just about to grab one of the Hades figurines - the only one from the 12 he doesn't have when he felt it.

A buzz in his ears. Not like the one he felt when he was scared because of the minotaur or when Bianca told him she joined the hunters. A different one, like it was trying to warn him or something.

This lasted for almost an entire minute.

When the trio was walking back to camp, he couldn't shake the feeling that something wrong had happened.

* * *

Bianca's dead. Percy didn't say it, but he _knew._

He knew from the fact that she wasn't with the group when they came to camp half-blood.

He knew from the empty feeling inside of him.

He knew from Percy's expression.

He yells stuff at Percy and he _doesn't know anymore._

He was left alone. Alone with Percy and a horse and gods who wants to kill him and a bunch of campers who also tries to kill him and a dad who doesn't acknowledge him.

His mind is blank and a lot of thinks come in at once that he doesn't even realize what happened to the skeletons and that his feet is moving and he are running away from Percy and the others and the only place where he was supposed to be safe.

Nico di Angelo would never feel safe again, anyway. Not without a sister.

* * *

_You're losing life's wonder, _  
_Touch like strangers; detached, _  
_I can't feel you anymore, _  
_The sunshine trapped in our hearts, _  
_It could rise again, _  
_But I'm lost, crushed,_  
_cold and confused with no guiding light left inside_  
_You were my guiding light_  
_When comfort and warmth can't be found  
__I still reach for you,  
__But I'm lost, crushed,  
__cold and confused with no guiding light left inside_

_You're my guiding light, _  
_When there's no guiding light left inside, _  
_There's no guiding light in _my_ life_

~Muse, Guiding Light

* * *

**A/N:** I originally planned for this to be like what Nico felt when Bianca died, inspired by the song Guiding Light by Muse and my fingers just typed and I don't really know what I was typing so this happened! I don't know if this was kind of OOC for you but, hey, Bianca wasn't really introduced in the book and Nico was emo-goth grieving for Bianca. And I thought Nico crying at chick flicks was funny. So.. Yeah.

**Disclaimer:** I am Rick Riordan! Spoiler Alert! In Mark of Athena, Annabeth dies so Percy becomes a butthole and kills everyone else including all the Olympians! He was invulnerable with the help of the Power of RAGE and LOVE! When Zeus died, Percy claimed the throne and became King of The World and God of Sexy Heroes.

Only kidding, folks :-)


End file.
